Introspective Reflection by a Homeschooling Mom Who Never Sits

Poor Little Guy
Here I am at 3:00 in the afternoon and through some not very thrilling, but out of the ordinary circumstances, I find myself with an hour and a half of unexpected free time. What will I do with it? Blog and then read a book of course!

Avery woke up this morning with a pretty high fever. We stayed home from the gym and he played enough that I was able to get some much needed cleaning done that I had planned for the morning. By 10am he was done; poor guy. I decided to put him down for a nap and you never saw a 2 yr old more willing to get in his bed. He pulled the covers on himself before I got to it. While I felt sorry for him, it made morning school quite simple. By noon, he was up again and more pitiful than ever. This posed an interesting delimna. We run a pretty tight ship during the day and I had so much time to get lunch done, kitchen cleaned, have storytime, and put Ave down for his normally only nap, only to have 30 minutes of free time and then start afternoon school. I popped in a video until I got the kids' lunch done and then set Avery in his chair. He didn't touch his food and just sat there staring. After a few minutes of sitting, he wanted out and thus began, "I just want you to hold me."

Before I started homeschooling, I remember many times when Alton or Alayna were sick, just being content holding them and rocking them for hours. Today I realized that Avery has never had that! For one, he doesn't get really sick very often which is a blessing, but if he does, he gets plopped on the couch with a video and some green juice or EmergenC and a blanket. I go on with my schedule and he has never complained about this.

Today was different. After battling with a guilty conscience over whether or not to cancel afternoon school and all the chores I try to squeeze in between subjects, I plopped myself down in the recliner with my little boy and the family's favorite, huge, fluffy Steelers blanket and settled in for the afternoon. Thirty minutes into this and I realized that I had lost some perspective on what it is to be a Mom. Alton and Alayna were immediately all over me full of giggles as they pretended to be sick and begged to sit on my lap. Avery was not willing to share and I jokingly told them that they had had their days when they were younger and it was Avery's turn. In my mind however, a sadness crept over me as I realized....

I NEVER SIT DOWN!

I don't mean sitting down in front of the computer, or in front of the TV. I mean sitting down in the main room of your house, just for a few minutes. My kids flocked to me as Mommy was suddenly open for attention. It was some what of a horrible revelation as I watched them. Soon Alton settled onto the couch nearby with a book while Alayna realized I hadn't eaten lunch and proceeded to fix me an awesome sandwhich and a salad! As she brought me my plate, she said, "This is so nice. Alton's reading, Avery's sitting on your lap...and it's just quiet."

I'm going to look back and realize how short my time was with them and I'm going to regret that I took all that time to clean the kitchen when I could've just sat down for awhile, stopped being busy and just relished being a Mom and enjoying my children; listening to them and holding them on my lap (yes even my 8yr old son), and just being. I can't help but relate it to the state of being verbs that I've been teaching Alton about, "Mommy is." Period. End of sentence, no other verbs at the end for 15 minutes a day from now on. And get this: I'm not even going to schedule a time for it! It's just going to happen.

I'll Buy It!

"There's something you need to know before we start. There is no way you will be able to win this game. I am the best Monopoly player in this family and you don't have a chance so just enjoy playing and no crying when I win."

Alton and Alayna were staring at me with their mouths wide open, not believing what they had just heard me say. I didn't say it because I am a boastful, arrogant person, who derives great pleasure from "talking trash" to her children. My comment served a much greater purpose. It was part of a new strategy to get through playing a game with them without Alayna crying or Alton stomping off to his room everytime Rob and I win a game. You see Rob and I believe that when you play someone better than yourselves, you get better yourself and so basically, we don't just "let" them win any games we play.

The game that evening was Monopoly. Having many pleasant memories of logging endless hours playing this game with my siblings, and thinking it would be a great supplement to their Math work, I ushered them into the world of paying rents, managing money, and snatching up Boardwalk as quick as possible. I schooled them on many tricks early on in the game...buy everything you land on, acquire a monopoly as soon as possible, and be shrewd in your trades.

Thirty minutes into the game, I started to have an uncomfortable feeling and so I made an assessment of the situation and slowly began to realize that my children had learned well from me as they both had monopolies and I had none. When developing these properties, Alayna in particular, saw no need to have houses, but to just go ahead and buy hotels on Mediterranean and Baltic. Alton was enjoying buying houses piece by piece on his New York etc..monopoly. Having bought everything I landed on and still being unable to acquire one, and the children being less than reasonable with me when it came to selling me some of their properties, and my dollars dwindling, I found myself very close to eating some serious crow.

There was one concept they were not catching on to, and this has been an issue in real life when they spend their money. Alton kept paying me way over what the rent cost so that he could get change. Alayna commented several times when the bank gave her change, that she was "really making some money now." I kept trying to explain over and over that they were not making in money by me giving them change; that is was left over from what they paid me, but it just doesn't seem to be taking. Alton landed on one of my properties that was $20 rent and proceeded to try and pay me with a $50! This I didn't allow as I was running a little low on small bills and once again launched into my explanation about receiving change.

Fortunately, the other thing I told them at the beginning of the game, was that we would not finish that night. We set it up on the Dining Room table so it could sit out and we have played it about 3 nights with no end in sight (unless I land on New York my next turn), so I am it appears, just delaying the inevitable and I will very soon be losing one of the first games of Monopoly I have lost in a very, very, long time and that to one of my inexperienced children!

The Tooth is Out!

It fell out of her mouth while she played on the computer today. She was so excited. She became a little annoyed later in the day when she began to sense that other people were not as thrilled over the event as she was. In particular was the dull look she got from her friend at co-op who had already started losing teeth at age five. Over the last few weeks we would try to get it out with floss, but her teeth are so small, we couldn't get the floss to stay on. The poor tooth had been through so much, I think it just threw itself out of her mouth in frustration.

She went to bed quite willingly tonight. She informed me late in the evening that sometimes the Tooth Fairy brings a prize along with the money. I told her I hadn't heard anything about that hoping to prepare her for the fact that the Tooth Fairy would not be delivering a prize unless the Tooth Fairy comes up with some inspiration for one that doesn't involve running to Wal-Mart.

Amusing Quotes and not so Amusing Arguements from the Day

There have been many things over the last couple of days that my children have done that were not amusing. I don't know if I can blame it on the snow or what, but they have been at each others throats on more than one occasion lately. This coming from kids that usually get along really well, and so I have no patience for this "phase." With the fighting though, there has also been an unusual amount of funny conversations and comments. The first of which I'll share is Alayna after having gotten into it with Avery who is just learning to disagree with her.

Me: Alayna, remember he is just learning about sharing, you have to be patient.
Alayna: Mom, you don't understand. Avery has grown up into a big kid that cannot handle his problems.

When asked if she was able to handle her problems at age two she responded, "Yes! Yes I could!"

When we got home from the store the other day and the kids were putting away the groceries, Alton came across the organic cookies which I buy sometimes. Rob often helps himself to more than the allotted portion of these which leads to great protest from Alton and Alayna. They are not buying the excuse that worked for so many years, that "Daddy has a bigger body." Anyway while unpacking them Alton said to Alayna, "We've got to make sure Dad doesn't see these." I scolded and said, "Alton we need to share them with everyone." Alton replied, "Yeah, and you know how Dad shares...with himself." I had to laugh.

Lastly, the biggest fight of the day between Alton and Alayna was very dramatic with both of them crying and stomping around. This is not unusual behavior for Alayna, but when Alton does it, you know he has been offended. It seems that Alayna told Alton that he cares more about his comics than he does about her. Alton some how interpreted this to mean that Alayna thinks his comics are stupid. For those that aren't aware, Alton is determined to be a comic strip writer. He has been writing them from before he learned how to write words and could only print letters. He would just ask us how to spell things. Once, I asked him if he ever got tired of writing comics and he told me, "Mom, it's kind of like my kid job." So whatever it truly was that Alayna said to him today to shame him for not playing with her, it upset him.

As I tried to moderate their argument with both of them crying Alton said, "Alayna thinks my comics are stupid and she doesn't understand it's my job!" Alayna said, "Well, Alton never plays with me he's always doing comics." Granted, our schedules are a little tight with school and chores. There really isn't a whole lot of free time during the weekdays, so I honestly haven't found a good solution for them both to be happy. We used the rest of Science time praying together in the homeschool room that they would get along better and work on putting each other before themselves. As far as I know there weren't any more fights for the rest of the day. I'm not sure about the evening because despite Rob's paper deadline tomorrow at 5pm, I was able to sneak out to a night of much needed Bunko with my military spouse friends.

Avery's Birthday Party

Last night we celebrated two new two year olds birthdays; Avery and his friend Kate. They are a day apart and so cute! Kate can already speak in full sentences and was very aware of the birthday festivities that were to take place. She knew it was her birthday, that she was getting cake, and that she would get to open presents. Avery on the other hand, didn't seem to care it was his birthday, but was pleasantly surprised to be presented with some new toys (almost all with wheels), and had he understood that I made that truck cake just for him, he probably wouldn't have shared. Ahhh the differences between boys and girls. If I had not experienced a two year old little girl in our own family, I might be worried. They just know more sooner.

By the way, Avery's favorite gift was a garage that our friends were getting ready to give to Goodwill, until he found it during his party.

Happy Birthday Avery!

It's Avery's official 2 year old birthday today. We woke him up with "Happy Birthday" to which he responded with a big smile but probably didn't have a clue what it was about. His party isn't until Saturday so there hasn't been a lot of fanfare, but it did snow for the first time since we've been here; a big beautiful snow actually. They cancelled the schools after about an hour and a half which I thought was a little ridiculous all these kids walking in the snow and buses everywhere on our way home from the gym. I didn't realize it at the time, but once home, I was home for good for the day. I couldn't back my car out of my parking space in our long sloping driveway. Choir and Praise Team practice were cancelled and Rob's school closed, so we're all home now cosy together in our house! I'd like to have a birthday like that!

By the way, if you haven't been over to my all-natural blog in awhile, then you might want to check it. I've been posting short blogs with some raw and healthy recipe ideas for kids. I never have time to write everything I want to say about something, so to keep things moving, I'm opting for some shorter entries for awhile. http://www.allnaturalarmymom.blogspot.com/

A Two Year Old in the House

It is the eve before the littlest member of the house turns 2. Does he suspect anything? I don't think so. He's heard the word birthday a lot around the house lately, but has no idea what that entails.

Saturday night we will celebrate with his little friend Kate who is turning two the day after him. I'm going to do the cake and somehow make it half princess half train/truck/heavy equipment or some such. I'll post a picture. It's been I'm not sure how long since I've decorated a cake, and in fact, Alayna is quite sore that she did not have any cake this year. It just kind of happened that way, so 2008 is the year Mommy makes a cake for your birthday!

This is writing week for Rob. His first submission of his 40 page paper is due on Monday. I've basically insisted he work on the thing at school. He gets too distracted at home so he's been up there for at least 8 hours a day. Last I heard he was on pg 18....I just can't worry about it. He'll write a bang up paper, but there will be an all-nighter involved next Sunday night.

A Random Picture From Today

Avery has a favorite hat as seen here. It is an odd looking fleece thing that he insists on wearing, if he gets a hold of it.

Because Sometimes You have to do Things You don't want to Do

Motivating three kids who'd rather be playing than doing school has made the title above an all too often spoken mantra, especially on Wednesdays. As much as we love Sundays, there's something about Wednesdays that fail to illicit feelings of excitement. Perhaps it's that middle of the week drudgery because there are still too many days ahead to get excited about the weekend and too many days behind it to still feel inspired about a new week. I actually don't mind Mondays. I'm usually ready to get back on "the schedule". Two days off on the weekend is about all I can handle before the kids start to drive my crazy.

During the week they're so busy that any freetime they have is spent in earnest play, whereas on weekends, too much free time for the kids means bickering, whining, and wandering around "lost". Mind you, that never happens to Alton who can come up with endless tasks to be accomplished, but the other two have definite lost moments and so come to their parents expecting to be entertained. For Avery that means playing car garage with him or reading the same library book over about 12 times. For Alayna that means playing doll house or princesses. These are things I don't mind doing...for about 15 minutes and then I'm back to marathon cleaning or whatever else I can't get done during the week.

This morning, I woke up with a particular bad case of the "I don't wanna's", but I got out of bed and got ready to go to the gym because sometimes you have to do things you don't want to do. Wednesdays are my second longest run day of the week too. I would not mind this, except that all my runs except Saturdays, have to be done on the treadmill at 8am. Otherwise, it just will not fit into the schedule and running on a treadmill for 4 miles is nothing short of b-o-r-i-n-g.

Coming home from the gym, my attitude was not any better about the prospects of starting morning school, but we did because sometimes you have to - well you know what I was going to say. Because of my attitude, I took a few short moments to dwell in self pity especially at the point where I was giving two different spelling tests simultaneously all the while holding a little boy wearing his coat and clutching several matchbox vehicles begging me to go get in the car (He loves to go. He doesn't even care where). Why am I homeschooling when I could be out shopping and having lunch with those other Army spouses who choose to put their kids in public schools? Homeschool Moms do have these moments especially on bizarre beautiful springlike days in the middle of January....hmmm 30 minutes before lunch and Alton still has Latin and handwriting to do. Hmmm...I think I'm a Charlotte Mason homeshcool Mom today instead of a Classical Homeschool Mom. "Okay Alton, scrap the Latin test for the day and get outside with Alayna and Avery." With Alton more than grateful to comply, he fled the house with his siblings. Sometimes you have to do things you don't want to do, but other times there is great delight in realizing that those things are not so important as what you feel like doing.

I began to fix lunch and watched them from the kitchen window. For several moments they were gathered around our biggest tree (and it is a big one). I tried to take a picture but with my camera batteries dead and my phone needing to be charged, it just didn't happen so I'll have to describe it. The three of them were gathered around the tree studying some ants busy at work. Apparently, there was much to be discussed on the subject. It was just too cute and I was glad that they were together and not all split up at school and that I was able to watch them while they played. Oh yeah, that's one of the reasons I homeschool and I'd rather have these moments than to be out shopping and lunching with friends.

After about 30 minutes I reluctantly interrupted their play with lunch on the deck. I can't believe the weather we're having. After that, they decided to use the bubbles that Santa got them, these cool ones that somehow form a thin layer of plastic that doesn't pop easily. Avery was an easy target and I saw him running up and down the deck with numerous little plastic bubbles resting in his curls. Maybe Santa didn't think that one through too well, after all, exactly what chemicals did they have to put in those bubbles to make them do that? Oh well, once won't hurt them.

We've had some quiet time now and Ave is down for his nap. Somehow starting Math just doesn't sound that great, but we will because sometimes you have to do things you don't want to do.

Ahhh...Sundays

Sundays are our family's favorite day. Right this very minute the children are happily watching Funniest Home Videos which is tradition on Sunday nights at our house.

The day always starts out a little hectic. I have to be at church at 7:30am for Praise Team and Rob has to leave with all three kids ready for church at 8:30am It is always interesting to me that I can do everything but put on Avery's clothes and somehow Rob is still late... sometimes very late. This morning started with me giving a lecture on the ills of arriving late at church and how I get three kids ready to go everyday and still arrive on time at the gym each morning at 8am.

Today was especially nice because for the first time Rob was in the sanctuary seated right at 8:30am. I was impressed. Now that I know it's possible though, look out. After church we usually head home and lunch on something I throw in the crockpot. On really special Sundays however, we head to a local buffet, which we did today.

After that, it's home for naps. Everyone gets in their pajamas for the rest of the day (in the winter). Alton and Alayna have quiet time in their rooms while Rob, Avery, and I catch up on all the sleep we missed during the week. After naps it's family wrestling match on the bed. I usually do not participate in this activity as someone needs to be there to console whoever ends up getting hurt which is usually Alayna or Avery.

We soon move on to a light dinner of a yummy smoothie secretly packed with as many leaves of Kale as I can dare to cover up with vanilla and almond flavor.

Tonight we had a little extra time after dinner. The stereo in the living room got turned on and there was plenty of dancing. Avery in particular can really bust some moves. We do our family devotions early on Sundays because out here, TV shows come on really late. Soon after Funniest, it's off to bed for the kids. Rob and I spend the rest of the evening reading or getting ready for the next day. Probably boring to some, but treasured time to us!

Start off the New Year Running!

The moment that 2008 began, there was not a whole lot going on at our house. The kids were fast asleep despite Alton's notion to try and ring in the New Year with us. Rob and I were watching a movie and didn't notice it had past until about 7 minutes after. That's how exciting we are.

Today however, we dropped our kids off at some friends and went on a date of sorts to run a New Years Day 5K. I had planned to meet a couple of my friends from the track club, there's Connie that fits my pace exactly, and Kate who I don't even plan to see once the race starts. She ran a 7 minute mile today and was the 5th woman in, not quite my league. Connie and I ended up doing a 10 minute mile which broke records for us. My shoe came untied at the first half mile, but I didn't dare stop. Rob and a school friend were somewhere behind Kate and ahead of us. It was a fun day and I have that much more experience before my 10 Miler in March. There are two more 5K's and an 8K before the big race, so Rob and I plan to hit those as well.

If anyone out there is saying, "I could never do that," just remember that I didn't run my first race until I was 32 and there are people a lot older than me that get started. My friend Connie was a lifetime smoker until she decided she wanted to be a runner. She decided to quit at age 42 and start her running hobby. She is doing great too. We keep each other encouraged.